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Joke of the Day

"ME: (signing) What color are apples? BOBO THE GORILLA: (signing) Please free me from this prison ME: (writing) Still struggling with colors"

"Mom 1: My son loves gluten free chips. Mom 2: Asher eats everything organic. Me: My son had a chocolate donut and a booger for breakfast."

"As a child my girlfriend loved train sets Most of my adult friends thinks its weird she still plays with them. I think it's perfectly normal for a 6 year old."

"Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? It runs through your jeans."

"""Squad goals,"" I said, aloud, to nobody, as two rats helped each other move an entire bagel into a hole in the subway tracks"

"God created women and the devil taught her to smile."

"So, i wanted to know what my weight was. 'Holding your belly in is not gonna make you lighter' my wife said. But how am i supposed to see the numbers?"

"They say that there are rising levels of LGBT population in Spain... There's not a day goes by that a Deigo's Bi"

"I don't care how polite your sign is, i'm flushing the toilet paper."

"What do you call a pun in a marathon? A running joke"