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Joke of the Day

"As a child my girlfriend loved train sets Most of my adult friends thinks its weird she still plays with them. I think it's perfectly normal for a 6 year old."

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"When The Rock is about to do it to his wife I bet he says something sexy like ""You ready to Rock?!"" or ""Rock, paper, scissors?!"""
"The Chinese coined the phrase ''It's not you, it's me'' while looking at family pictures."
"My life is a constant battle of wanting to pet a dog and not wanting to talk to its owner."
"What's Irish and stays out on your deck? Paddy O'furniture"
"LAMP FOR SALE: gold, antique, good patina, evil genie, functions like new, you will be killed, shiny, polished, be careful what you wish for"
"A: You look nice today, is that a new shirt and haircut? B: I masturbated yesterday, So I had to clean up afterwards. And one thing lead to another. Hair trimming included."
"What do you call a nun in a wheelchair with a cell phone? Virgin Mobile."
"Why can't you surf on microwaves? Because they're too small."
"How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? Two: one to change it and another one to change it back again."