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Joke of the Day

"Mom 1: My son loves gluten free chips. Mom 2: Asher eats everything organic. Me: My son had a chocolate donut and a booger for breakfast."

"What did one depressed saggy boob say to the other? We better get some support before people think we're nuts!"

"When I'm sad I drive over to Keanu Reeve's house and watch him check the mailbox for scripts."

"Why don't biology and physics get on? They lack chemistry."

"What is the difference between a dirty bus stop, and a lobster with breast implants? One is a crusty bus station, and the other is a busty crustacean."

"Farmer: What would you do if a bull charged you? Mary: I'd pay whatever it charged."

"Your girlfriend should never be jealous of another woman. Instead, you should do your best to make other women jealous of her."

"Women only call me ugly untill they find out how much money I make Then they call me ugly & poor"

"Ever had sex while camping? It's fucking intense."

"Why does a dirvorce cost so much? Because it's worth it"