131599

Joke of the Day

"Why are Jewish men circumsised? Because Jewish women only touch things 20% off."

"What's the most popular game to play in jail? Smash Brothers"

"Recent study has revealed that masturbation might help curing the common cold. Well I hope it is true because I haven't got any more tissues left.."

"How do you catch a fish with peas? Drop some peas along the shore, and when a fish comes up to take a pea, you grab him."

"When I get Cheeto dust on my fingers I use it to draw warpaint on my face. I am serious as fuck about my Cheetos."

"Go to a Mexican restaurant, get a table for two, tell them you're waiting for your date & then eat free chips & salsa for 7 years."

"How does Sean Connery shave? CTRL + S"

"I like my women like I like my coffee From that cheap place down on the corner."

"Sleep tight! Your brain is a billion times more complex than your laptop. And laptops break all the time."

"Jesus: Unless you become like children you will not enter heaven *Gets hit by a water ballon* Jesus: That's not what I meant, Paul"