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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sarcastic mountain chain? The Kappalachians."

"Based on Trump's History, if elected, he is likely to get divorced and remarried while in the White House It will be ""Marriage Apprentice"" White House Edition"

"I just got back from a pleasure trip. I took my mother-in-law to the airport."

"A cleaning service of men who think a hot girl is coming over in 20 minutes."

"Someone just threw a bottle of Omega 3 tablets at me. I only suffered super fish oil injuries, but I'm lucky I wasn't krilled!"

"I plan to retire at 30. The used tire business is just calling my name."

"Why don't ducks become doctors? They are afraid of accusations of quackery"

"I have a vegan girlfriend... and she's nice and all, but sometimes I think she just looks at me like a piece of carrot"

"What would call it if all the cars in the country were pink? A pink carnation."

"There's nothing funny about leaked celebrity nudes Which is good because it's hard to masturbate while laughing."