129752

Joke of the Day

"Out of all the gruesome noises coming from the bathroom stall next to me, the camera click was the most troubling."

"I was almost in a devil's threesome once, but at the last minute the other guy backed out. So i looked at the girl and said... ""Well that's a load off your back"""

"How come if you eat two cookies you gain 3 lbs. Then when you take a major dump, you don't lose anything?"

"I got a job making wallets out of elephant foreskins If you rub the wallet it turns into a suitcase."

"Baby oil If olive oil is made from olives, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?"

"How many mystery writers does it take to change a light bulb? Two - One to put it most of the way in, and one to give it an interesting twist at the end."

"How does Austin Powers decide which guys he will sleep with? (NSFW) By giving them an oral test first. ""If you can gag me, you can shag me!"""

"Stupid people need a CPU upgrade, colorblind people need a GPU upgrade. Just thought of this a few minutes ago, thought you guys might like it."

"Harry is a? Fucking WIZARD!"

"Why is Santa's Sack so big? Because he only comes once a year."