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Joke of the Day

"*wakes from a dead sleep* SHOULDN'T RED BULL GIVE YOU HORNS?"

"I've been watching so much porn lately that... I spit on my hot-dog before I put it on my bun..."

"Fish with no eyes What do you call a fish with no eyes? -A ""FSH"""

"What's the similarity between a smart employee and a perfect volleyball hit? They're both fine assets!"

"The worst thing about Muhammad Ali sending a ""Tweet"" to Mayweather . . . Ali couldn't type it and Mayweather couldn't read it."

"In honor of Earth Day I'm going to forage for my own food. Does anyone know what a Dorito plant looks like?"

"So I was eating some Middle Eastern food... ...but then my fala fell"

"I tried to play water polo once But my horse drowned. :("

"Why can't bicycles stand up on their own? Because they're two tired!"

"So I proposed to my girlfriend at a funeral today. She wasn't happy. Apparently I killed the mood."