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Joke of the Day

"Teacher and Student Teacher: Why are you late? Student: Because of the sign on the road. Teacher: What type of sign? Student: The sign that says, ""School Ahead, Go Slow.""!"

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"How do normal people vs feminists laugh? Normal People: HeHeHe... Feminist: SheSheShe.."
"Saw a homeless guy babbling about conspiracy theories that doesn't really make sense... You could say it was a vague rant."
"Pick-up line guaranteed to work every time! Does this smell like chloroform to you??"
"I dig, you dig, we dig, she dig, he dig, they dig. Its not a beautiful poem, but its very deep."
"I wait tables with an obnoxious ex-mechanical engineer... ...he's always going on and on about the restaurant's utensil modulus."
"Me: Can I dip my breadstick in your Alfredo sauce? Him: Usually it's me asking you that. 13YO: SHUT UP. STOP IT RIGHT NOW!"
"It might take more muscles to frown than to smile, but it takes even less to completely avoid eye contact in the first place."
"Whats the last thing that goes thru a bug's mind when it hits the windshield? Its ass."
"How many cats can you fit in a smart car? None, you can't get any pussy in a smart car."