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Joke of the Day

"Whats the last thing that goes thru a bug's mind when it hits the windshield? Its ass."

"My performance as ""guy who acts disgusted when wife says our recently divorced neighbor is dating a 23 year old"" is getting early Emmy buzz."

"Mother: How do you like your new teacher ? Son: I don't. She told me to sit up the front for the present and then she didn't give me one !"

"A Jewish boy asks his father: ""Father, can I please borrow 50 dollars?"" The father replies: ""40 dollars! What on earth do you need 30 dollars for!?"""

"[WP] You are an assassin in WWII trying to find a German defector on a U-boat. Unfortunately you got a little lost on the dock... Whoops, wrong sub."

"A tree fell on a family's house and killed everybody. It was rootless."

"Way ahead of you, ""cashless society."""

"CREATION OF MAN God: And as they age, they shall lose all the hair on their heads and grow more in their ears & noses Angel: Yes, my Liege"

"How is a woman like a condom? The both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick."

"Schrodinger's Cat recently went on a crime spree He's wanted dead and alive"