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Joke of the Day
"First rule of flight club...no penguins."
Next Joke
"Why didn't the two introverts go camping? Because it's two fucking in tents."
"I masticate at least three times a day, usually at my computer Damn sticky keys!"
"What's green and flies over Germany ? Snazis. This insanely corny joke brought to you by my Dad, circa 1990. May he rest in peace!"
"Motorist: Does a deer have a horn? Police Officer: No a deer has two horns. Motorist: Then it must have been a car that ran over my uncle."
"The last time we had a white Christmas, I made snow angels. I skidded on the ice and took out three pedestrians."
"What do the twin towers and genders have in common? There used to be two of them, now it's offensive to talk about."
"What does Cam Newton and Fig Newton have in common? They both crumble under pressure"
"God: I made a rainbow! Devil: I'm making all the fire alarm batteries die in the middle of the night."
"[date with girl I met at the park] Waiter: is everything ok, sir? Me:*fighting back the tears* Her:*sigh* he expected me to bring my dog."