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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad? One trains the mind the other minds the train."

"Don't ask me for childcare advice unless you want nuggets of wisdom like ""always punch holes in the box so they can breathe."""

"What's the difference between 3 dicks and a joke? (you're mom can't take a joke)"

"Paula Deen is set to release memoirs about life with Type 2 diabetes It will be titled ""Paula Deen - For Butter or Worse"""

"A little girl asked her father, ""do all fairy tales begin with 'Once upon a time'? The father replied, ""No, some begin with - If I am elected."";"

"I don't have a beer gut, I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs."

"Why did the suicidal chicken cross the road? To get to the other side"

"""What are you getting this Christmas?"" asked my friend. I said, ""Fatter."""

"What did onlookers say to the Wright Brothers as they took off? BYE PLANE"

"He drove his car into a tree And found out how the Mercedes bends"