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Joke of the Day

"I am looking for two Chinese people to help me improve legislation for animals in Asia. That way, two wongs can make a right."

"Is it just me, or does hamstring sound delicious?"

"""I wish some random guy from India would DM me!"" -no girl, ever"

"Helen: Mum do you know what I'm going to give you for your birthday? Mum: No dear what ? Helen: A nice teapot. Mum: But I've got a nice teapot. Helen: No you haven't. I've just dropped it."

"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself...& murderous clowns, & ISIS, & one of these two getting elected President after Halloween."

"What is the easy way to get a wild elephant ? Get a tame one and annoy it !"

"I'm Puerto Rican, but not ""carries a knife in my purse everywhere I go"" Puerto Rican. Sometimes it's in my bra."

"Math Joke. There are 10 types of people. Those who know that this joke is in hexadecimal and F the rest. Credit: Numberphile"

"Why do men masturbate? It's sex with someone they love."

"Why are they called hemorrhoids? Because asteroids was already taken."