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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many letters 'T' are in Indiana Jones? A: 17. Ta-ta-tat'-taaa ta-ta-taa Ta-ta-tat'-taaa ta-taa-taa-taaa!"

"What do you call it when a bunch of Olympic swimmers have the shits for days? Dia-Rio."

"Why doesn't Rihanna tell her boyfriend jokes anymore? He always beats her to the punchline."

"What's black and blue and hates sex? The boy scout in my trunk."

"A Texas woman found a snake head in a bag of green beans. Meaning someone will be finding a bean in their bag of snake heads."

"Why is santa's sack so big? Because he only comes once a year. Like most jokes on this thread this is stolen, not being a shitcunt and taking credit..."

"Ariana Grande would be the first kid on the factory tour taken away by the Oompa Loompas."

"A friend told me I'm out of touch. I laughed so hard I almost peed my Hammer pants."

"I just finished reading Mein Kampf... Pretty good for light reading, I rate it nein out of ten."

"Cop: do you know why I pulled u over? Me: yeah, I was going like 120 back there Cop:.... Me:.. Cop: sir, your tailamp is out Me:..."