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Joke of the Day
"Just bought a 2013 calender, a rope and a stool. I like to keep the store clerk guessing."
Next Joke
"That's a nice sham you've got there... It'd be a shame if somebody added an e"
"My married life is awesome. I cook for my wife and she does my laundry. We are maid for each other."
"I went to see the worst faith healer ever last night. He was so bad, a bloke in a wheelchair got up and walked out."
"So some guys were hanged... ."
"What do you call it when the robot from Futurama gets in a minor car accident while wearing a dress? A gender bender Bender fender bender."
"Making reservations for one at a fancy restaurant because every now and then, I like to be wined and dined before I take advantage of myself"
"PIGEON MAGICIAN: I want you to pick a car, any car...DONT TELL ME!. Ok [shits on windscreen] is THIS the car you chose?"
"ALCOHOL. Because no one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep."
"If you jump off a bridge in Paris... They'll declare you in Seine"