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Joke of the Day
"You know you masturbate too much when... both hands pretend to be asleep."
Next Joke
"When you go to the hospital and there's music playing These are some sick beats!"
"So I was trying to grab a grape with my fork... But it slipped. It seems as though my efforts were... Fruitless."
"[2nd time at girls house] ""where's your dog?"" Oh he isn't mine. I was dog sitting [makes text alert sound w mouth] ""Its work. I gotta go"""
"A joke told by the mods of this sub. ""Long"""
"How can you tell if a man is sexually excited? He's breathing."
"I wonder how long it will be before ""You look like a million bucks"" is an insult. #inflation"
"When a man falls over the side of a boat... the crew shouts ""Man overboard!"" When a woman falls over, the crew shouts ""Full speed ahead!"""
"What kind of pictures does a mermaid take on her phone? Shelfies."
"What is the difference between a grizzly bear and a limp dick? There isn't one, you can't fuck with either one."