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Joke of the Day
"It's so hot today I went to see the ex just for the cold shoulder and icy stare."
Next Joke
"anything is possible with the right attitude and a sledgehammer"
"Why don't you make like a tree & get slammed into by my drunk uncle on Halloween 97 why didnt you call a cab Uncle Gary we miss you so much"
"changed my voice settings to Spanish on my gps it told me i didn't have enough people in the car"
"I want to be a ""cool"" uncle, so I let my nephew play with all the things I wasn't allowed to when I was his age. Mostly knives and bleach."
"What do you get when you cross a lawnmower and a canary? Shredded tweet."
"Congratulations to Alabama for making same sex marriage legal Now the men can finally marry their brothers"
"A good friend is like a four leaf clover: sometimes you accidentally run them over with a lawnmower"
"I see there's going to be a new PeeWee Herman movie on Netflix. It's a good thing it won't be in theaters."
"Lets get freaky. I mean really Freaky. Like I can't look you in the eye for two days kinda freaky."