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Joke of the Day

"I was pretty upset when I heard clocks get set ahead an hour... Oh well. Not worth losing sleep over it."

"Why couldn't the clock be kept in jail? Because time was always running out."

"roses are red... Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have alzheimers, cheese on toast."

"The body burns a lot of calories digesting food. That's why I eat instead of exercising."

"What's orange and sounds like a Parrot? A Carrot"

"Why is modern wheat supperior to old wheat? it's bred and better!"

"If I had a dollar for every time a homeless person asked me for money... I'd still say no."

"cucumber and potato. What the potato said to the cucumber? - Hi, How are you? What the cucumber answered? - OH MY GOD!!! A TALKING POTATO!!!!!!!!!"

"If you see a toilet in your dream, do not use it. It's a trap."

"Why do feminists hate church music? Because of all the Hymns."