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Joke of the Day

"A roman legionnaire walks into a bar holds up two fingers and says, ""Five beers, please."""

"I'm concerned about my local funeral parlour closing down It's right on the high street, but every time I walk past it's dead in there"

"What is China's favorite ice cream flavor? Licorice"

"Why are people so surprised that Joe Biden acts like such a poonhound? It's in his job description. After all, he *is* the Vice President."

"I hope you're using all the time you save by saying ""totes"" instead of a ""totally"" to learn a trade."

"Knock Knock Knock, knock. Who's there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, it's cold out here!"

"Vladimir Putin was recently late to a meeting He was really Russian"

"My Wallet My wallet is like an onion, opening it makes me cry :-("

"Where do you bury a donkey? In an asshole!"

"Accidentally walked into a mosque ""This isn't where I'm supposed to *be headed*"""