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Joke of the Day

"What does a tickle me Elmo get before it leaves the factory? Two test tickles"

"my dad always makes fun of me for taking selfies all the time but if he didn't want such a beautiful child he should've kept it in his pants"

"How many Americans does it take to change a bulb? None, Mexicans do it for them."

"My bank says my password isn't strong enough. Did it ever stop and think that my password has a lot going on right now?"

"I eat sunflower seeds because I like food but I absolutely love littering"

"Apparently the yellow power ranger died after being hit by a car. ""It's MORPHINE time"" joked one ER nurse, who was later fired."

"My favorite animal at the zoo is the gorilla... I ain't lion."

"What should you not put in the washer with a load full of towels? A towel full of loads"

"I used to have a problem watching internet pornography... but then I upgraded from dial-up to a cable modem."

"What's The Difference Between Santa and a Muslim? Santa will be able to enter the united states next year!"