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Joke of the Day
"I always feel good about giving the money to the homeless,... Now they can afford more signs."
Next Joke
"My uncle found the g-spot once... ...he tells people he lost those two fingers in the war."
"I hope my liberal use of made-up words doesn't make you...discomfortable"
"You guys wanna hear a poop joke? No... I shouldn't tell it. It's too corny."
"Did you hear about the perverted statistician? Standard deviation wasn't enough for him anymore..."
"I don't know which child you think I don't treat correctly... Jake, Thomas or the fat ugly one?"
"[sign outside butcher shop: POLISH SAUSAGES - ASK US] ME: Yes, I'm here about the sausage polishing job?"
"People on Facebook ""Like"" everything but grammar."
"Spent all last night mouthing words to my dog to try and convince him that he'd gone deaf."
"Sure Hillary sucks... ...Just not as much as Monica."