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Joke of the Day

"I don't know which child you think I don't treat correctly... Jake, Thomas or the fat ugly one?"

"Chuck Norris is actually every member of Slipknot. That's how fast he can change costumes."

"Horse walks up to a mirror and says ""Why the long face?"" Mirror says, ""I'm not sad, I'm just reflective today."""

"There are 10000000 people in a room 1 of them understands binary and the other 127 don't. Decided to make my own variation of the original joke :)"

"I've just de-flowered a virgin. I mugged a Pokemon Go player coming out of a florists."

"What did the fat piece of shit say when he screwed up? Sorry that I screwed up **lards**."

"MY NECK, MY BACK, A STRANGER TOOK MY CAT"

"So Philip Seymour Hoffman is in the new Hunger Games . . . If anything can bring him back, it's some powerful heroine."

"Last week, I went to my doctor and told him I was constipated. He told me I was full of shit."

"what do you get when you call a subreddit ""jokes"" and have more than 21 000 readers? an average of 22 jokes a day. this is a fucking joke"