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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a priest and a pimple? At least the pimple waits until you are 14 before it cums on your face."

"How do you know your daughter's a slut? Because you never kiss her goodnight."

"You gotta hand it to short people because they can't reach it"

"I've started seeing someone about my porn addiction. Her name's Brandy."

"Why did God invent economists? So accountants could have someone to laugh at."

"if school taught me to say no to fast food instead of drugs i'd be high as shit but not really fat which sounds cool"

"I feel like if there ever was a zombie apocalypse I'm so numb to them at this point I wouldn't even bat an eye."

"My doctor says I need to avoid trans fats I'm really going to miss Tumblr"

"So, two pedophiles are talking... One of them says to the other ""I never really liked racing, I always come in a little behind."""

"What do you call... two black guys who are fighting over a watermel.... Goddamit billy go fuck your sister in another room, pa is trying to tell a joke."