11714

Joke of the Day

"I just mixed peanut butter and Nutella together in case anyone's curious why I've suddenly started attending church."

"Maybe early risers just aren't as awesome at sleeping as I am."

"If you're a ""Blocked caller"" you're gonna be a ""missed call."""

"What the only tag a Tumblr user can't have? A small Oops looks like I pissed off the fatties"

"I remember when my mum used to tuck me in. She really wanted a daughter."

"Want to buy a pocket computer? No thanks I already know how many pockets I've got."

"Basketball would be a lot more exciting if each team was allowed one bear."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Popeye's is across the street and I prefer take-out to dine-in."

"Well, at least I didn't kill a lion! - Bill Cosby"

"How do you know you're leading a sad life? When a nymphomaniac tells you ""Let's just be friends."""