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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord? mmmmmmy ass!!!!!! neeeheeeeeheeeeheee -Evil Betty"

"Marriage... a relationship between a person who's always right and her husband."

"That one. ""that one."" says a booy. ""what do you mean?"" says another boy. ""oh, i was just answering your question."" ""what question?"" ""i already told you."""

"ME: What's this bit here? NURSE: ...his heart ME: Hm. NURSE: Your resume said you were a surgeon ME: My resume says a lot of things"

"Guy comes home from work and catches his mate shagging his wife so he stabs him to death. His missus says, ""fucking carry on like that, you wont have any mates left""."

"I thought you were good looking, until I clicked ""view more pictures"""

"Atheism and Religion are but two sides of the same coin. One prefers to use its head, while the others relies on tales..."

"What could possibly make moviegoers forget about Will Smith's movie After Earth? A Concussion."

"The problem with Australia is that it's full of scary reptiles... Tony Abbot for example."

"Why doesn't Mexico win Olympic Medals? Because all their best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America."