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Joke of the Day
"[Me as 911 Operator] *phone rings* I wait for it to stop ringing and text back ""what's up"""
Next Joke
"Dammit Springsteen, I was born in the USA too but you don't see me making millions in monthly residuals from a 20 year old song about it."
"How come does Luke Skywalker does not have a girlfriend? He was looking for love in Alderaan places"
"How do blind people know when they're done wiping?"
"I hate how guys with tiny penises try to overcompensate with flashy cars. You're not fooling anyone, ambulance drivers!!"
"CNN: We're not sure but we'll report it anyway."
"6 and 7 are hanging out. 6 says ""you wanna grab a drink?"" 7 says, ""Nah, I aint ate yet."""
"When I really sit down and think about it My ass has seen some shit"
"Nothing says you married into the wrong damn family like your mother in-law crashing your honeymoon."
"The dyslexic pregnant virgin said it was an act of Dog."