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Joke of the Day

"Apparently Kevin Bacon was killed last night. . . And they're charging the shooter with 6th degree murder. . ."

"I just drank another bottle of brake fluid. My friends think I'm addicted, but I can stop when I want to."

"I spent over an hour at my wife's grave yesterday... whew, that was the longest I've ever lasted"

"A Zen master once said to me, Do the opposite of whatever I tell you.' So I didn't"

"I had a Muslim co-worker named ... Christian"

"What do you call a sarcastic Canadian cow? Cowlin Mockery"

"Did you hear about the race between Cambodia and Burma? It was a Thai."

"An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. The bartender says ""Is this some kind of joke?"""

"Why does Kanye West need a billion dollars for ideas? Ben Franklin discovered electricity with a kite."

"I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. Then I had probably the biggest vowel movement ever!"