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Joke of the Day

"Life's a bitch, Because if it was a slut, It would be easy."

"What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant praying mantis."

"When Trump was a kid wanted to be an astronaut when he grew up... ...but all he was able to accomplish was the first syllable."

"What do you call a pest from the moon? A luna-tick."

"In a serious water shortage /r/showerthoughts should be shut down."

"Did you hear about the man that slept on corduroy pillow? No? I'm surprised, it made headlines!"

"What did the lunatic vacuum cleaner salesman say to his son before murdering him? Dyson."

"""I'm sorry, sir, cash or credit only."" The rain sadly puts its check away. 21st century technology has not been kind to him."

"A jokey named Chris is running late for his race... ...his coach points at his horse and yells ""Chris top her"" Edit: Spelling"

"I wouldn't say I'm superstitious, just a little stitious."