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Joke of the Day

"""ALL I WANNA DO IS HAVE SEX WITH MINERS!"" is the exact wrong way to proclaim your sexual proclivity toward those who excavate coal."

"person texting me: hey I'm outside me: [covered in glue and accidentally tripping onto a pile of several thousand photos of you] uh HANG ON"

"Witnessed the birth of my cousin's first child... She said we should've used a condom"

"Number one handheld A recent survey indicated that smartphone is the number 1 handheld device.. Penis has slipped to number 2.."

"Damn girl, are you a ""damn girl"" joke? Because I want to see you everywhere for the first 5 minutes, then suddenly none of you."

"As horses say to one another. Any friend of yours is a palomino!"

"Some people might think being a gay man with a foot long dick is a good thing But it's just a huge pain in the ass for my boyfriend."

"How many ears do Star Trek fans have? 3, Right Ear, Left Ear and The Final Front-Ear."

"Joke of The Day Have you heard the story of the magic sandwich? Never mind, it's just a bunch of bologna."

"What does the quantum duck say? Quark Quark"