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Joke of the Day

"Witnessed the birth of my cousin's first child... She said we should've used a condom"

"A man goes to the library and asks for a book on satisfying your partner in the bedroom. The librarian said, ""Let me check that it's in first"". ""Yeah, that's the one."""

"How do you fail a urine test with a clean sample? Poop in the specimen cup."

"Me: How long have we had that pillow? Wife: No idea Memory foam pillow: Two years, five months and two days"

"what is the difference between love and herpies? Love doesn't last forever."

"Why don't lobsters share their dinner? Because they're shellfish!!!"

"Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home"

"Just heard Kim Kardashian's new song. All I'm going to say is that, for as many black dudes as she bangs, I expected more."

"Eve: I got an Apple. Adam: ... Eve: ... Adam: ... Eve: What? Adam: I thought we'd decided on Android. Eve: The serpent said this was better."

"I was gonna tell you a gay joke... Butt fuck it"