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Joke of the Day

"Damn girl, are you a ""damn girl"" joke? Because I want to see you everywhere for the first 5 minutes, then suddenly none of you."

"robin williams punchlines were always on point i never thought he would ultimately leave us hanging"

"""I need a boyfriend"" No, you WANT a boyfriend. You NEED water, cause you sound thirsty."

"Yo momma so fat the last time she went swimming she chewed a divers foot and they closed down sea world."

"Why is Bon Jovi's bed always messy? Because he doesn't think it matters if you make it or not."

"How do you turn a robot on? You push his power button."

"What's the difference between a Goodyear tire and 365 condoms? One is a Goodyear and one is a great year"

"Why is it called Black Friday? Because everything is a steal."

"I was with a girl last night who told me she wanted me to give her 9 inches and make it hurt... so I fucked her twice and hit her with a rock."

"How many white people does it take to change a light bulb? A brunch."