110332

Joke of the Day

"When the smog clears over Los Angeles... ... U.C.L.A. I am not at all sorry for this joke. Edit: So at some point I went from 20 to 923 upvotes. I regret not checking this sooner."

"Dang girl, are you an unreliable scientific claim? Because imma need you to BACK THAT UP"

"What's the difference between cider and apple juice? My wife doesn't let me cum in apple juice :-("

"My girlfriend called me a pedophile Which is a pretty big word for a 9 year old"

"Did you hear about the new emo website? www.emo.com/wrists"

"I said goodbye to everyone at a party and then mistakenly walked into a closet and was too embarrassed to walk back out so I live here now."

"What's a pirates favorite letter? Nope, it's the C that they love"

"A laptop made in the United States is a portable device. A laptop made in Mexico is a deportable device."

"Sarcasm : Because life doesn't come with a free ""stay out of jail card"""

"What did Vladimir Putin say after dropping a smashing one-liner? Putout"