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Joke of the Day

"I can't wait to see the new movie, ""Constipation"" Unfortunately it hasn't come out yet."

"I treat pavement like Tampax Because some bitches bleed on it!"

"Vegans don't beat their meat They beat their celery stick."

"Hey, are you BB-8? (harmless spoiler) Coz I'd like to fix your antenna ( )"

"How do you recycle a condom Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it."

"Challenge Only a Genius can say these four words, Four times Really fast without getting Tongue twisted. Eye , Yum , Stew , Peed"

"This actually happened My brother has a lockbox and lost the key, so he said to me ""Zaent, can you pick a lock?"", I replied ""Give me two and I'll pick one."""

"I seruptitously flicked a booger on a guy who was being mean to his wife. If this is what being a sniper feels like, I like it."

"Have you heard Adrian peterson used to play baseball? He might play for the twins this year. Apparently he is a switch hitter."

"Greek Tailor's Shop A Greek man walks into a Greek tailor shop holding a pair of jeans. The blind old tailor squints at him. ""Euripedes?"" The man nods and holds up the pants. ""Eumenedes?"""