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Joke of the Day
"The dyslexic, agnostic Insomniac. He lies awake at night wondering if there is a dog."
Next Joke
"My therapist says I'm narcissistic. How can someone who's perfect be narcissistic?"
"How I wear a scarf: 1. Take scarf and drape it over my shoulder 2. Find an annoying co-worker and choke them to death with it. 3. Repeat"
"Have you heard that joke they don't tell gays?"
"How do you make hard cider? Put it in the freezer."
"What do Justin Timberlake and Theon Greyjoy have in common? A dick in a box"
"Why was the owl afraid of Raidoactivity Because it was made of Hootonium"
"Why can't Harry Potter distinguish between his best friend and his pot in potions class? They're both cauldron"
"Research suggests that when someone disagrees with you, you should speak faster so they have less time to process what you're saying."
"When you play Monopoly with Chuck Norris, you do not pass go, and you do not collect two hundred dollars. You will be lucky if you make it out alive."