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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my coffee Stuffed into a bag. Slung over the side of a mule. And brought to me by Juan Valdez."

Next Joke
 
"A turtle is crossing the road.... when he is mugged by two snails. When the police show up they ask him what happened. The shaken turtle replies ""I don't know...it all happened so fast!"""
"What's the difference in Xbox One and your mother? I genuinely care about your mother."
"Throughout the history of espionage, the phrase ""We have ways of making you talk."" Has yet to be used on a woman."
"Why did the semen cross the road? I put the wrong socks on this morning..."
"Q: Where do cows go on Friday nights? A: To the moovies."
"I probably shouldn't boast, but, no matter what city I'm in, the banner ads say the same three hot chicks are dying to meet me."
"What do Apple and the US economy have in common now? No Jobs"
"Well it seems everyone's so up in arms about gun control these days."
"I took my wife to Hawaii for our 25th wedding anniversary. You know what I did for our 50th? Went back and got her."
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