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Joke of the Day

"My right eye is twitching like it's at some kind of techno dance party that the rest of me wasn't invited to."

"I just can't stop making dad jokes! I don't know how much father I can go...."

"What does the elephant say to the naked man? How do you breath out of that thing? It's so small."

"What did the black kid with diarrhea say to his mom? Help! I'm melting!"

"Theres this one word I always stumble on when I try to remember it.... oh yeah, the word is forget."

"I flip off the rollercoaster camera, then buy a mug with the picture on it, ride it again, flip off the camera again while sipping my mug"

"I used to have an imaginary girlfriend but she left me for my best friend. Apparently he had a bigger imagination."

"How to catch a polar bear: Step 1: cut a hole in the ice. Step 2: set a can of peas opened and in front of it. Step 3: When the bear comes to take a pea kick it in the ice hole."

"I had to dump my cross eyed girlfriend I think she was seeing someone else"

"Two eggs boiling in a pan, one male and one female... The female egg says ""Oh my, look, I've got a crack"" ""No good telling me"" replies the male egg, ""I'm not even hard yet"""