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Joke of the Day

"kids let me explain this in teen. your father & i have unfollowed each other. he was yoloing another woman. it's 4:20 time to smoke divorce"

"How do you make an elephant float? Take a cup and add root beer, two scoops of ice cream, and an elephant"

"First Spaceman: I'm hungry. Second Spaceman: So am I it must be launch time !"

"You don't need a parachute to skydive... You need a parachute to skydive twice."

"What do you call a werewolf who has taken an interest in social justice? Awarewolf"

"TIL a man went in to have his right leg amputated but somehow they removed his left. After the mistake was corrected, he then sued but lost Judge said he didn't have a leg to stand on"

"People on Facebook ""Like"" everything but grammar."

"Why was the circuit arrested? Because it was charged with battery!"

"Did you hear about the cannibal? He dumped his girlfriend...*flies away*"

"It's not that I'm a bad boyfriend. I'm just a horrible person."