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Joke of the Day

"Doctor: You're obese. Patient: ***Doctor: You're obese. Patient: Whoa, for that I definitely want a second opinion. Doctor: You're quite ugly, too.***"

"It's going to be easy for Trump to build that wall... ... everyone's shitting bricks everywhere"

"What did the blind fortune teller tell his customer i can see your future (I'm not sure if this has been posted already)"

"What do you call a Jedi knight who delivers babies? Obi-Gyn Kenobi."

"If you want to catch a squirrel just climb a tree and act like a NUT"

"People in my office have this strange habit of naming their food... Yesterday, I had a sandwich named ""Michael""."

"Have you heard the one about the 10 apples and 8 of them were good? ... 2 bad."

"How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it. That's the oldest pun in The Book."

"I got my car towed by a celebrity yesterday. I don't even have THAT big of a car."

"Cop1:did u hear about the kidnapping? Cop2: should we go help? Cop1: No it's ok he woke up. This fall on CBS ""Good Cop, Dad Cop"""