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Joke of the Day

"I've never grabbed less than fifteen napkins."

"If I want to nap for just an hour, I have a big glass of water beforehand. Alarms can be turned off, but a full bladder waits for no one."

"Why can't Jesus roller skate? Because he's naild to a cross."

"The first rule of Alzheimer's's Club? The first rule of Alzheimer's's Club, Is that you don't talk about Chess Club."

"Invisibility You just don't see it these days"

"Why do we.... Cook bacons and bake cookies?"

"Procrastination Some times I procrastinate so badly on one item of home work that I do other homework to get out of doing that one item"

"Did you hear about the Wall Street investment banker who won $10 million in the lottery? He's so happy that he's giving some serious thought to paying back his student loan."

"Mom: I'm worried you might end up alone. nMe: Don't worry mom, do you know how many followers i have???nMom: ... ( Worried face)"

"My Christian friend got caught masturbating to a hymn It gave a whole new meaning to 'O Come All Ye Faithful'"