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Joke of the Day

"An alligator decided to have unprotected sex... Now he has Gatorades."

"Doctor Doctor I think I'm a butterfly Will you say what you mean and stop flitting about!"

"I've decided to leave my past behind me.. So if I owed you money- I'm sorry but I've moved on."

"confession time ""hogwarts"" is a super gross thing to name a school and as a child I kinda hoped it would get destroyed because of that"

"If by ""physically fit"" you mean that I am going to physically fit this entire cupcake into my mouth then yes."

"I was having an argument with my deaf wife. All women are the same, they don't listen."

"Why was the calf afraid? He was a cow-herd!"

"How come if ants are always so busy they always get time to show up at picnics ?"

"I went to a dinner party for anorexics. There was an all-you-can't-eat buffet."

"My friend David lost his ID. Now we just call him Dave. well i'm bad at telling jokes"