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Joke of the Day

"I've noticed the less open-minded someone is, the more open-mouthed they tend to be."

"Two envelopes had a baby It was male"

"Where do chickens go to get their coffee? Star- B-BWAKS"

"What is the difference between the Leaning Tower of Pisa and the Twin Towers? Better reflexes."

"My Grandfather has the heart of a lion. And a lifetime ban from the zoo."

"Strange how FB doesn't automatically add the enemies of your enemies as your friends,"

"Me and my German girlfriend like to rate our sex on a one to ten scale while having sex. So last night we were having sex and we tried anal. The whole time she was yelling out nine!"

"What do Princess Diana and Pink Floyd have in common? Their last great hit was the wall."

"Teacher: You can do anything you set your mind to [I try to sneak outta class but somehow mess up the pull door twice] Except maybe that guy"

"By all means, get married. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."