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Joke of the Day

"And the final rule of Fight Club is... ...just have fun and try your best."

"Please stay on the line. Your call is important to us. We think we might be in love with your call. We made your call a mix tape."

"Where do Grape Nuts come from? Boy grapes."

"Which football team to you need to connect up your computer? Leeds."

"Do you realize that if real women had the same proportions as Barbie they'd be only 11.5 inches tall?"

"Whats the Difference between Hitler and Usain Bolt? Bolt can finish a race"

"game of thrones is such a cool show. they should make a book out of it. [props a stick under a box to capture all the nerds that respond]"

"Anyone have a lot of unused pregnancy tests? Hate to see all this pee go to waste."

"About a year ago I told my friend there's plenty of fish in the sea. Last I heard he is still sitting there holding his rod."

"Be myself? BE MYSELF?!?! You don't care if I ever get laid again, do you?"