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Joke of the Day

"Feeling stressed out? Make a nice cup of hot tea and then spill it in the lap of whoever's bugging you."

"I won't visit /r/aww Its nothing but kitty porn"

"What's the worst part of breaking up with a Japanese girl? You have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it"

"What did one telepath say to the other telepath? Nothing."

"[March 15] Brutus: Going 2 the senate? Caesar: yeah u? Brutus: yep it'll be killer Caesar: how so? Brutus: like cool u know rad senate stuff"

"A computer developer after spending time with his girlfriend And after he makes love to her he tells her that they're compatible together and to not update the drivers"

"Whats pink and always slippery? A pink slipper"

"Finally watched an episode of America's Got Talent and I disagree."

"Why didn't the Romans find algebra very challenging? Because X was always 10"

"I have a hole in my sock... Darn it!"