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Joke of the Day

"The biggest difference between men and women... Is what comes to mind when the word 'facial' is used."

"I went into a bar and ordered a Bin Laden Two shots and splash of water."

"Today I bought cupcakes without sprinkles. Diets are hard."

"When Jerry Seinfeld dies... I really hope his tombstone says: *Jerry Seinfeld 1954 yadda yadda yadda 20XX*"

"Did you hear about the alligator who couldn't get a hard-on? He had a reptile dysfunction."

"I told my dog to sit . . . . . . but he half-assed it."

"Did you guys hear the one about the mascara and the lipstick? The relationship was alright, but the make-up sex was amazing."

"Nerd play Q:What do you call it when seven minutes in heaven is played at Comic-Con? A: Close encounters of the nerd kind"

"Gurl, you remind me of a box of chocolates.....(Why?) Cause I want to take your top off."

"Why did the cowboy want a Weiner dog? To get a long little doggy."