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Joke of the Day

"The punchline Did I ruin this joke?"

"I always use a short cut when I'm going to knife fight a midget."

"Did you hear about the guy who died while digging a hole for a coffin? It was a grave excavation."

"i look like i'm trying to get water out of my ears when i dance"

"[After losing a rap battle] ""How did he get a hold of my credit score?"""

"Which insect didn't play well in goal? The fumble bee!"

"i talk to dumb ppl the same way i talk to a puppy... ""who's blocking the exit?? WHO? who's blockin' the way!?! YOU are! yes you are!!!"""

"Idk what was worse, the fact that my girlfriend text me saying ""sorry breaking up with you"" or that a minute later she text me back ""sorry wrong number."""

"If you think Big Government is bad... Wait until you see *Yuge* Government."

"So, a man with a baby newt on his head walks into a barber's... And says, ""Short back and sides, axolotl off the top."""