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Joke of the Day
"I like my penises like I like my pizzas large with extra cheese"
Next Joke
"(fairly gosh darn NSFW) Yeah, so, I'm a necrophiliac, right... .....I *had* a girlfriend, but the rotten cunt split on me."
"I just battle rapped my 4 year-old and rhymed ""take a nap"" with ""piece of crap"" so don't tell me about your parenting skills."
"Everyone's an atheist until they're making a phone call & praying it goes to voicemail"
"I'm not a doctor but I know adding cheese to anything makes it an antidepressant."
"Jesus was the original child star who fell in with the wrong crowd and died young."
"1. that's not a pregnancy test, and 2. you're pissing on my flash drive"
"Cop: You been drinking?nnMe: No.nnCop: Say the alphabet backwards.nnMe: Alphabet the. nnCop: Hilarious. Say each letter.nnMe: Each letter."
"I love looking at oranges, they are just so appealing"
"What does it take to be a president? Nothing"