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Joke of the Day

"What if the Bad News Bears literally gave you bad news? Bear 1: You're adopted Bear 2: The cancer is terminal Bear 3: This tweet ain't funny"

"So I was reaching for the Viagra... But I picked up the tipp-ex by mistake. I woke up with a massive correction."

"Did you know that Hitler invested in Minute Maid before he died? He heard they were 100% concentrated juice."

"I pulled on a door that says push. Cause I don't let a fuckin door tell me what to do."

"I'm not racist. I'm not racist, racism is a crime and crime is for black people."

"Whats the difference between a Snowman and a SnowWoman? Snowballs!"

"heard this on Storage Wars A Chinese couple own a restaurant, they're in the bedroom and the husband asks if they can 69 and the wife says why you want beef and broccoli now?"

"Only a fraction of you will understand That there is a fine line between a numerator and a denominator. Took from a facebook page"

"There have been many time in 2010, when I have annoyed you, disturbed you, irritated you, bugged you... today I just wanna tell you... I plan to continue in 2011!"

"Did you hear about the epileptic snake? It had a hissy fit."