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Joke of the Day

"Do you ever get shampoo in your eyes and wonder what the name of your guide dog will be?"

"I really wish I knew who removed the jack from under the car I was working on. The suspension is killing me."

"What's the most influental animal rights philosopher? Karl Barx"

"Yo mama so fat NASA has to orbit a satellite around her!"

"Did you hear about the cowboy who wore paper trousers, paper shirts and a paper hat... He was arrested for rustling."

"I opened the door to find my friend masturbating. He yelled ""Close the door!"" So I yelled, ""Get inside!"""

"Did you know there are only two Lawyer jokes? The rest are all true."

"The giant panda is no longer endangered... It's now extinct"

"On Mondays, Zombies feel alive inside."

"Many people say they have ADD because they can't focus on their homework. It pisses me off. See, I really have ADD, and"