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Joke of the Day

"How many dragon ball Z characters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1, but it takes 6 episodes."

"Word on the streets is.... ""LOADING ONLY"""

"Have you heard about that new movie Constipation? Oh wait - it hasn't come out yet! *ba dum tss*"

"This ATM will not give me free money no matter how many times I try the Konami Code."

"Ladies, please. Get a hold of yourselves. There's enough of me to disappoint all of you."

"Are you a magician?? Because you're making my penis levitate."

"I really like ceilings,.. I guess you could call me a ceiling fan."

"The best thing about Twitter & Instagram is that every girl finally gets to be a princess, or a _princess, or even a prin_cess."

"""You can't build your own man."" They told me. But they underestimate my low standards. And my shopping cart full of luncheon meats."

"I have a life pro tip I never wear condoms"