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Joke of the Day

"The main problem with gay marriage is when two men hold the knife to cut the cake they will be too strong and cut through the plate & table."

"almost called my teacher ""mom,"" but I caught myself after ""mo"" and added an ""n."" I had to pretend I was Jamaican for the rest of the year."

"My boss told me to have a good day. So I went home."

"A Muslim, a Communist and a black man walk into a bar. The bartender says: ""Welcome, President Obama!"""

"What does a soviet call someone with good vision? Glasnots."

"Veterinarian- You're here to discuss your dog's salivation? Me- No. My dog's a good dog, he'll go to Heaven! I'm here about his slobbering."

"Every time a bell rings an angel gets its wings. It's always the same angel. It's covered in wings now and wants to die but can't"

"The Friend zone. It's like being turned down for a job, then they call you a week later complaining about the person they hired."

"How do you make holy water? You burn the hell out of it."

"Where was the first discovered potato located? In the ground."