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Joke of the Day

"A nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket... and says ""Oh dammit some asshole has my pen!"""

"Hulk Hogan: I struggled to overcome manic-depression. Me [as his therapist]: So you could say you had to wrestle mania? *gets leg dropped*"

"What's the most confusing holiday in the hood? Father's day."

"The Italian faucet.... When it drips it goes wopwopwopwopwopwopwopwop."

"""Well ... I'll be dammed."" Bodies of water when they see beavers coming."

"You're so beautiful that last night you made me forget my pickup line."

"How does Moses make tea? Hebrews it..."

"The Beach Boys walk into a bar... ""Round?"" ""Round?"" ""Get a round"" ""I get a round?"" ""Get a round...."""

"Baltimore's chief export seems to be artisanal crime narrative."

"Long arm of the law Will have different meaning when Trump becomes president"